On Leadership- You cant come in a Pussycat ,then turn into a Lion.- John Milton Lawrence, "speak or get benched

A very simple truth is this, you catch more flies, with honey, than you do with vinegar, let me explain. One employer, started out being decent, kind and understanding to his employee's, then when the sales numbers dropped, he turned, cold and verbally abusive to get results. This did not work because no one of the employees took him serious, they just saw him as someone who now wanted to intimidate and BULLY them to get results, they did not respond. Now as the business owner sat pondering, what would be the fate of his business, because he has realized, if you fail at human relationships, you fail at business, you fail at LIFE. Though not advised, he would have stood a better chance coming in a Lion, then turning into a pussycat, you can never come in a pussycat, then turn into a Lion, you will be seen as,desperate and weak.

John Milton Lawrence- Speak Up- Speak Out- Overcome your fear of Public speaking

Practice Fearless Speaking, not Fearful Listening

Practice Fearless Speaking, not fearful listening Now that may seem like an odd headline, but when you think about it in the context of, speaking in public, or judging others, when you listen, through your fears, and prejudices, you don't get very far because, listening through your fears and prejudices, gives you a very distorted view of things. Id' like to list this poem, I heard Dr. Wayne Dyer recite, but I don't know who the author is, the name of the poem is-                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   A woman was waiting at the airport one night,

With several long hours before her flight.
She hunted for a book in the airport shop,
Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop.

She was engrossed in her book, but happened to see,
That the man beside her, as bold as could be,
Grabbed a cookie or two from the bag between,
Which she tried to ignore to avoid a scene

She read, munched cookies, and watched the clock,
As the gustly "cookie thief" diminished her stock
She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by,
Thinking, "If I wasn't so nice, I'd blacken his eye!"

With each cookie she took, he took one too.
When only one was left, she wondered what he'd do.
with a smile on his face and a nervous laugh,
He took the last cookie and broke it in half.

He offered her half, and he ate the other.
She snatched it from him and thought, "Oh brother,
This guy has some nerve, and he's also so rude,
Why, he didn't even show any gratitude!"

She had never known when she had been so galled,
And sighed with relief when her flight was called.
She gathered her belongings and headed for the gate,
Refusing to look at the "thieving ingrate".

She boarded the plane and sank in her seat,
Then sought her book, which was almost complete.
As she reached in her baggage, she gasped with surprise.
There were her bag of cookies in front of her eyes!

"If mine are here," she moaned with despair.
"Then the others were his and he tried to share!"
Too late to apologize, she realized with grief,
That she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief!!!!

John Milton Lawrence-Ebook Review- How to Master Your Fear of Public Speaking

Fearless Public Speaking

Most people suffer from what's known as Glossophobia, or stage fright, when called on to make a toast at a wedding, or any situation we are called on to speak in public, our knees get weak, we get butterflies in our stomach's, our palms start to sweat and the words come out sounding like were from outer space. If this sounds like you, don't worry because you are not alone, millions of people have the Fear of public speaking. Comedian Jerry Seinfeld says " when it comes to funerals, most people would rather be the one in the casket, than the one giving the eulogy". Good news! Help is on the way. The fear that you have of public speaking, is basically, an imaginary factor, and anything imagined, can be unimagined. Was it former President Roosevelt who said "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself". You can learn to be a fearless, more confidant speaker in 30 days or less, Vince Lombardi, the famed football coach said, "The Price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand."

Speak or get Benched John Milton Lawrence, is an expert Author and Public Speaking coach, who teaches the principles of Fearless Public Speaking. Archives February 2011 January 2011 Categories All A Fearless Analogy Athlete Become Believing Speaker Celebrity Confidant Public Speaker Confidant Public Speaking Fearless Fearless Public Speaker Fearless Public Speaking Get Benched How To Humor Icebreaker Speech Information Lead Love Love For Others Magic Message Messenger Overcoming Your Fear Public Speaker Public Speaking Speak Toastmasters RSS Feed

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Speaking about what makes you angry, eliminates Fear

While this may sound a bit out of the norm, to speak about what makes you angry, is a very effective technique. Dale Carnegie the author of "How to win friends and influence people" discovered this, completely by accident. The logic behind this, is, to notice how passionate people can be, when they have been hurt or wronged in some way. I can absolutely tell you, if you have been wronged and had to get up in front of an audience, the city council or who ever, you would not be focused on your fear, but rather your grievance, nothing could be easier. When crafting your speech, make sure it is about something you are really passionate about, something that kind of makes you angry, some injustice you would like to right. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. found his passion, in the civil rights movement, and his desire for equality for all people and genders, it made him a fearless and passionate public speaker, even in the face of death. So ask yourself, what makes you mad, the people of Egypt, were so angry, with what many would say was 30 years of oppression, their anger, brought about a REVOLUTION, the phycsological barrier of FEAR, had been broken, and Pharoah could oppress no more. 

Speak or get Benched

This post is titled, after the name of the blog, and speaks to fact, that many people have short circuited their personal growth, by allowing fear to dictate their lives. We use the analogy of an athlete, to make our point.When people are paying you big bucks, and expect you to deliver, what happens, if he doesn't perform, or live up to his potential, he gets benched. Who want's to sit on the sidelines of any sport, while all the other players, are in the game. Even the sport of life, many people are content to let others, have all the adventures, make all the big money, while they sit idly by complaining or having a pity party. My answer to that is to cry two tears in a bucket and if that don't fill it ___________, well you know the rest. There are many people out there, who could otherwise benefit, a lot of people, with their acumen, but instead, have let their fears mute them, because of their fear of public speaking, I'm here to say to you, rise to your greatest heights, your greatest potential, your best self, lead, follow or get the hell out of the way. Speak or get benched.

I'ts the Message not the Messenger

Just as the title implies, it's the message, not the messenger. One sure way to set yourself up for failure is to focus on the me, me, me, remember you are there to impart useful information to your audience, that will help them solve a particular problem. By targeting your audience, and knowing what their interests are, you have tailored your speech, to speak to their interests and concerns not yours. One can teach some of the finer points of public speaking, but the speaker must have an inward desire to say something, to express something of value. Then with all the might and passion you can muster, get up and do it. You might have heard me tell the story from Claude M. Bristol's book, "The Magic of Believing" about the great Magician Howard Thurston, who loved to entertain his audience through magic. Before going out on the stage he would always remind himself, that is was about the audience, and not him. He would say to himself prior to getting on stage, "I love my audience, and I'm going to give them the best, that's in me. The audience responded and he made $2 million dollars, in yesterdays money. No one is really wealthy, until his desires include, the concern for others.

Speak and Grow Rich

Let me start by saying for all of you who get frightened at the prospects of speaking in public, fear no more, anyone can become a confident and entertaining speaker with a little practice and know-how. You can approach public speaking in two ways, one is Inspiration, there are many public speakers who with nothing more than the topic, speak directly from the heart , meaning whatever inspired words come to mind about their particular topic, that's what they speak on. Now all of us are not so lucky, because when were nervous, nothing that makes sense comes out of our mouth's. Most people use the second approach, taken from an actors training workshop that says "security is in knowing your lines"know what it is you want to say, write it down and stand before a mirror and practice it, then practice the practicing, then when it comes time to give your presentation you will deliver it like a pro. Above all remember as a public speaker, you are a teacher, imparting useful information to your audience, so the next time you are called on to make a speech, fear less, and speak more, with confidence, and know that your audience wants you to succeed. The funny thing about fear, is that it is basically at it's core an imaginary thing. what was it that Roosevelt said "the only thing we have to fear, is fear itself." Now that we know exactly what it is that may be keeping us from being all we can be, its time to clear our minds, our imaginations. Don't create monsters in your mind, that aren't there, what you see is what you get. Instead of seeing yourself failing at public speaking, change the channel in your mind, and you'll be surprised at what a difference it will make. Learn to go into the talking mode in your head, telling yourself positive things, rather than being in the listening mode, that keeps telling you you will fail. Being an accomplished public speaker, can make a big difference in your income. Gain the know how, so you can Speak and Grow rich.